


Not That Different

by fio13



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Character Study, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Minor Violence, Post-Canon, Relationship Study
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2014-02-15
Packaged: 2018-01-12 12:03:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1186004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fio13/pseuds/fio13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At first glance, Koujaku didn’t seem like anything special to Noiz. In fact, the old man’s goody two-shoes approach bored the hell out of him.</p>
<p>But there was one thing that stood out- it was those intense, red eyes of his. When those eyes looked at other people, they held a kind light to them, radiating warmth. But that wasn’t what they showed when they fixed their powerful gaze on Noiz.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not That Different

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a drabble but somehow it turned into a 3k fic -shot-. 
> 
> Thank you to [Chelsea](http://archiveofourown.org/users/cataclysmicconniption) and [Shino](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinocchi) for helping me with this piece ;w; <3
> 
> Self-beta'd. Enjoy!

In the beginning, Noiz wasn’t sure what made him so drawn to Koujaku. At first glance, he didn’t seem like anything special to him. Sure, he had the looks, he was obviously physically strong, and he had a way with girls- nothing that particularly fascinated someone like Noiz. In fact, the old man’s goody two-shoes approach bored the hell out of him. He especially couldn’t understand the whole Rib and focusing on muscle and pride thing. It was outdated, overrated, and in his opinion, completely stupid.

But there was one thing that stood out- it was those intense, red eyes of his. When those eyes looked at other people, they held a kind light to them, radiating warmth. But that wasn’t what they showed when they fixed their powerful gaze on Noiz.

As soon as Koujaku aimed his red eyed stare at him, there would be a clear irritation and animosity towards Noiz written all over his features, and suddenly, he would look like a completely different person. There would be a sharp, menacing scowl engraved on his face as he glared daggers at him, insults falling from his lips. Those bright eyes of his would darken with anger, looking at him with an intensity that could cut steel.

Every time their gazes met, there was this veil of darkness radiating off of Koujaku that screamed of discontentment, of anger, and of pure, uncovered hatred towards the whole world. And for some reason, it seemed like he only dared showing it to Noiz.

Noiz knew that look very well; he saw it in the mirror so many times after all. It was the look that knew loneliness, that knew suffering and injustice of this world. The only difference was- Noiz didn’t dare showing it even to himself anymore.

As soon as he realized this, suddenly everything Koujaku did - all those fake smiles directed towards other people, all those polite promises given to a sea of countless girls, his mere presence - started irritating Noiz to no end.

After the whole incident in Platinum Jail, Koujaku had tried friendly approach with Noiz, giving him the same attitude he would usually give to everyone else. It was time to bury the hatchet between them, he had said. Now there was no need to have pointless fights- they’ve gone through so much together, after all. But Noiz didn’t like that idea. To him, being on good or bad terms with someone made no difference whatsoever. So he did what he did best- he started challenging him, jabbing at his pride with his casual taunting remarks that managed to rile the older man up every time, with no fail.

And soon enough- there it was. That same, passionate gaze, clear furry written on his face and his teeth gritting in complete annoyance as he grabbed Noiz’s collar and slammed him against the wall with so much strength, it took him a few seconds to recover.

Faintly, he could register Koujaku shouting insults, how he has never met someone so annoying in his life, how he needed to be learned a lesson.

All of that wasn’t very different from how most people treated Noiz. He was used to others cursing him, telling him that he was unwanted, that he was just a brat. He has heard it all before. But for some reason, when Koujaku did it, it stirred something so deep inside of him, something that he only felt when he was on the Rhyme field. It was a strange sort of excitement that pooled deep in his gut and that he himself couldn’t quite define.

He couldn’t help but smirk as he registered that familiar fire in Koujaku’s stare. Apparently, whatever he saw on Noiz’s face irritated Koujaku even more as his teeth visibly gritted more strongly, and knowing that he had that kind of effect on the other man gave him a satisfaction he didn’t know he could possess.

Before he knew what he was doing, Noiz was leaning forward and kissing him, a sudden urge to taste that raw anger taking a complete hold of him. For one brief second, everything seemed to stop, and then Noiz found himself flying to the floor, Koujaku straddling his hips and punches landing on his face. Noiz returned the punches with all his strength, not being able to feel the pain of it at all, but still, a strange energy radiating off of the older man managed to blow him away.

Just when he started to give in to the punches, Koujaku stopped and grabbed his throat instead, the force of his clutch barely giving him space to breathe. Feeling an overwhelming amount of excitement surge through him, Noiz sent him a defiant smile, ignoring the blood that was now trailing down his mouth.

As soon as Koujaku saw his smile, his gaze visibly darkened, and instead of a punch, Noiz could feel Koujaku press his lips hastily against his own. They proceeded to kiss like animals, Koujaku’s nails scraping the skin of his neck and teeth biting at his tongue and his hips grinding into Noiz’s with such force, like he wanted to nail him into the floor.

 

At first, Noiz couldn’t call it sex. It was too animalistic, too violent to name it like that. It was simply a pure, unrestrained exchange of raw passion. Things didn’t really change between them though - Koujaku still irritated the fuck out of Noiz, Noiz irritated the fuck out of Koujaku - the only difference was that now they both put that feeling into very good use. Now they solved their arguments not only with punches, but they also ended them with Koujaku biting at Noiz’s throat so hard until he drew blood, nails digging into his skin as if he wanted to tear it apart, and bruising, violent kisses that left Noiz breathless and feeling an unexplainable, desperate need of so much more.

They still argued every time they met, insults falling off of their mouths like a practiced act. This continued even after they changed their location from random street alleys to Koujaku’s apartment.

They’d throw fists at each other until they both landed on the floor of Koujaku’s room in a bruised, bloody mess. Then, after managing to catch their breath, they’d proceed to battle for dominance, their clothes flying all over the floor as they started to make out furiously. They would end their little game with fucking so hard that they both ended up with more scratches and bruises from the act itself than from the fistfight they had had prior to that.

Noiz kept coming back for more, and for some reason, Koujaku had no intention of stopping him. And just like that, days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months.

 

As the time passed by, slowly but surely, their relationship started to change. Before he knew it, Noiz was staying the night. The passion was still there, the insults were still there, but the fistfights had stopped. Instead, Koujaku became annoyingly obsessed with every new bruise that he saw on Noiz’s body that he knew hadn’t come from him, nagging at Noiz about his lifestyle, his eating habits, even his clothes. It was irritating to say the least, and very often these situations turned into arguments, only now they had an annoying air of good intention to them that Noiz couldn’t quite understand.

Up until that point, Noiz really didn’t question their strange arrangement. But then, Koujaku started doing things for him that he hadn’t done before. He started treating his wounds, he made him breakfast, even insisted on cutting his hair- grumbling the entire time - but still, he did it. This treatment was completely new and unfamiliar to Noiz and, needless to say, it confused him to no end.

Many times Noiz wanted to ask Koujaku why he even bothered with someone like him in the first place. But then, he would see the look in Koujaku’s eyes, that same one that he reserved only for Noiz, and somehow, that would be enough to keep his mouth shut and let the old man do whatever he wanted.

 

Every time they finished having sex, Koujaku would light a cigar, something that Noiz found particularly irritating. The smell of smoke was extremely bothersome, and Noiz didn’t get why one would love something like that at all. But still, every time he took a drag, a sort of peaceful look would grace Koujaku’s features. Noiz would find himself lying on the bed and secretly watching him as Koujaku stared off into space. For some reason, this look didn’t irritate him at all.

After a while, he realized that it was probably because it was one of the most honest expressions he has ever seen on the older man’s face.

 

Noiz wasn’t sure why he suddenly had the urge to observe Koujaku so much. He only knew that watching him made him feel an odd, completely unfamiliar sensation in his chest. As the time went by, that sensation started getting stronger, appearing when he least expected it.

He would feel it suddenly while he ate dinner at Koujaku’s dining table. Koujaku would send him one mock scolding look, commenting on how he was eating way too fast, and just like that, the strange tingling in his gut would appear, forcing him to look away from Koujaku’s teasing gaze.

He’d feel it every time he saw Koujaku stand outside his hair salon, happily chatting with his customers. Koujaku would see him pass by and he’d send him one quick, knowing stare, his eyes clouding with something Noiz couldn’t define, but whatever it was, it made his throat constrict and his heart beat that much faster.

This strange sensation would occur most strongly in the moments when Koujaku was buried deep inside of him, his eyes closed in deep pleasure as he was clearly on the verge of orgasm. When he came, that unexplainable warmth in Noiz’s chest would spread abruptly all the way down to his stomach, making his breath hitch and triggering his own release every time.

The feeling both confused and frightened him at the same time, but as much as he didn’t understand it, he didn’t see it as something unpleasant either. So he let the feeling take a hold of him, drawing him towards the older man more and more with each passing day.

 

Sometimes during the night, Koujaku would twist and turn in his sleep, painful gasps escaping his lips and sweat beading down his forehead. Then, he would wake up abruptly, fear and terror evident on his face as if he'd just witnessed the most terrifying thing in his sleep. Right after registering Noiz lying next to him, he would lie back down on the bed, a breath of relief leaving his mouth.

Sometimes they would just go back to sleep and pretend that nothing had happened at all. Other times, Koujaku would jump Noiz even before his breathing completely calmed down, growling and kissing him fiercely. For some reason, Koujaku was even more passionate than usual after these nightmares; his eyes would become more intense than ever, a glint in them almost animalistic. There was also this hint of desperate vulnerability in Koujaku’s stare. Noiz was far from an expert when it came to understanding emotions, and he knew very little about people in general. But still, seeing that expression on the older man’s face made him hold onto him just a tad bit tighter as he kissed him back readily, accepting all that Koujaku offered.

Because even though he didn’t get it entirely, Noiz understood enough to realize that he was clearly one of the very few, if not the only person who was ever allowed to see this side of Koujaku.

 

So one day, when Koujaku asked him about what was the deal with his ‘strange pain tolerance’, he didn’t lie to him.

To say that Koujaku looked surprised was an understatement. There was a clear mixture of shock and wonder written all over his features, and Noiz didn’t blame him. It wasn’t that often that you ran into someone who couldn’t feel pain at all except on his tongue, especially if they sounded completely indifferent about it like Noiz.

Truth be told, Noiz was slightly surprised at himself for uncovering even this much to Koujaku. It wasn’t that he had the need to hide his condition from others, but he also never thought it would be this easy to reveal it to someone either. And for some reason, saying it to Koujaku simply felt like the natural thing to do.

As much as he was obviously curious about the whole thing, Koujaku didn’t prod the subject any further. From then on, he just paid even more attention to putting pressure on Noiz’s skin when they had sex, but other than that, he didn't bring it up again, pretending like he never questioned Noiz about it in the first place. And deep down, Noiz was grateful for that.

But even though they didn’t mention it, Noiz could clearly sense the shift in their already strange relationship. Despite all the usual nagging and insults, Koujaku’s gaze now looked more understanding than ever, and it both baffled him and put his mind at ease at the same time.

 

It was around a week later that Noiz’s own curiosity finally got the better of him.

Koujaku was smoking the cigar as always, staring off into space, his torso naked and tattoos on his back fully exposed, completely visible thanks to the moonlight creeping through the window.

Noiz noticed that Koujaku obviously didn’t like his tattoos that much. It wasn’t that hard to figure it out, since Koujaku unconsciously frowned at the ink on his body every morning when he dressed.

He didn’t understand why though. Was the old man not satisfied with how it turned out? Was the design not to his liking? Not that he’d ever admit it out loud, but in Noiz’s opinion, the design of the pink flowers on his back somehow oddly suited him. On the other hand, the complicated, black drawing on his torso gave him this sort of sexy edge that made Noiz want to touch every inch of it and outline it with his tongue until it completely shone with his saliva.

Sensing Noiz’s intense stare on his back, Koujaku glanced at him with a questioning gaze that now held a hint of mild annoyance, but for the most part, he still looked fairly peaceful.

“What?” he asked, discarding his finished cigar into the ashtray.

“Did it hurt?” Noiz suddenly asked, and Koujaku showed confusion for only a brief second before he saw where Noiz was directing his gaze. As soon as he realized what Noiz had meant, his eyes darkened, and he let out a bitter sound, before saying,

“Like hell.”

Slowly, before he even realized what he was doing, Noiz inched forward and reached with his hand with an attempt to touch the tattooed skin on his arm. But before he could do so, Koujaku quickly stopped his hand with his own, a look on his face now one of panic. Noiz didn’t try to move his hand from Koujaku’s grasp, silently staring at him with confusion.

“… don’t.” Koujaku’s voice was gravely quiet and oddly soft at the same time, his eyes appearing serious before he averted his gaze from Noiz’s.

“Why not?” Noiz asked calmly, bringing Koujaku’s hand to his mouth and slowly flicking his tongue over his fingers. He sensed Koujaku visibly shuddering at his actions, but other than that, he stayed silent.

Noiz knew he was pushing his luck, but something about the way Koujaku trembled against his touch strangely spurred him on. So he took his chances, carefully moving his mouth up and placing feathery kisses along Koujaku’s tattooed arm. Koujaku now trembled more strongly than ever, clearly stuck between wanting to push Noiz away and giving into his touches, and this fact left Noiz with that strange, familiar feeling pooling in the pit of his stomach.

“Brat,” Koujaku said, vulnerability in his voice evident, “you… you should really stop with that.”

“Do you really dislike it that much?” Noiz murmured, his tongue now tracing the red mark on Koujaku’s shoulder.

“I … don’t, but that’s not what I- _Noiz_!” Koujaku suddenly snapped, and hearing his name fall from the older man’s lips for the first time ever was what had Noiz finally remove his mouth from Koujaku’s skin. He was straddling him now, his head inches above Koujaku’s, and he could clearly see the distress written all over Koujaku’s features as he stared at him.

“Listen. I… I’m not really who you think I am,” Koujaku started, but Noiz simply shook his head.

“I know who you are.” He didn’t know how he was so sure of that himself, but somehow, he _was_.

Koujaku clicked his tongue, visibly becoming irritated.

“You don’t understand! I… did some horrible things. I-“ but before Koujaku could confess something that he was clearly not yet ready to say, Noiz quickly silenced him with his lips, pressing his mouth against Koujaku’s desperately, until he felt him slowly relax against his body and give into the kiss.

“I don’t care,” Noiz breathed against Koujaku’s lips after he pulled away. “Besides, whatever it is, you clearly couldn’t help it. Am I wrong?” Noiz asked him, and judging by the way Koujaku’s eyes widened, he knew he was right.

Koujaku let out a small, humorless laugh, but he was clearly breathing with more ease now.

“I don’t get it. You can do so much better than me,” Koujaku mused, more to himself than to Noiz.

“Maybe,“ Noiz murmured, taking a lock of Koujaku’s hair and placing it behind his ear, revealing the tattoo on his face. “But that still doesn’t make me want you any less.”

Koujaku’s mouth fell open and his eyes clouded with thick emotion, and then Noiz was flipped over, Koujaku’s body straddling him and his trembling lips landing on his. Noiz eagerly returned the kiss and held onto Koujaku’s shoulders, sighing as he tasted tobacco on his lips and allowing that intense warmth in his chest to consume him.

 

Noiz still couldn’t say that he completely understood Koujaku. He wasn’t sure how their relationship worked either. There were still so many things he had yet to figure out, but for now, at least he knew one thing.

Koujaku wasn’t that much different than him, and for the time being, that was more than enough.

They could easily figure out the rest with time.


End file.
